• Dathan Belanger

Symptoms of Anger May Not Be What You Think

Updated: Oct 23, 2020

There are rising rates of anger issues in the mental health of our nation. The tools to deal with anger are seldom taught. 

As Christians, it is important to get a handle on anger because it goes against one of the core principles that we should follow, “love”. There are common symptoms that may warn us about an anger problem. 

Answer these following symptom questions

Question #1 — Do you feel you’re always right? An always right attitude may lead to anger if untreated.

No one is always right. We need to come to grips that we are human. We are sheep that need a shepherd to guide us. 

Question #2 —Do you have an all or nothing feeling? Life is not a pass or fail. 

Even if we fail we need to get back up again.

Question #3 — Do you feel you are cursed or have bad luck or that God is out to get you? There is no luck, only chance.

God’s love for you is so great he gave his only son as a sacrifice that we may be saved and have everlasting life. 

Question #4 — Do you overgeneralize? Such as saying all men are jerks. Life is very complex and it is difficult to find all the answers so it’s easier to generalize

Isn’t it better to gather all the facts before you open your mouth? 

Question #5 — Do you believe that you can read other’s minds? Some people think they can. Maybe the way someone dresses, their body language, or the words they use can give away their thoughts. 

Neither you nor another in a conversation can read each other’s thoughts. Hey man, hate to break it to you but we’re not telepathic.

Question #6 — Do you Catastrophize? There is usually a positive to every situation. 

You have only to search and you will find it, although the search may take a while.

These questions may not be what you have thought of concerning anger issues. If you answer any of these as a yes, you may need to work on your anger.

So how do we work on our anger?

First, we must be honest with ourselves and admit we have a problem. We must be self-aware and learn when the anger is coming. 

There are many techniques you may employ to counter anger. A few stand out as some of the best weapons of choice

Technique #1 — Journal your thoughts daily when you feel frustrated, annoyed, angry, very angry, or enraged 

Know what you’re feeling. Frustration typically is quiet when you are simmering troubled thoughts in your mind. Annoyed is when you show physical signs in any form. This includes sweating, increased heart rate, muscle tension, and tingling sensation. Very angry is becoming physically abusive like actively shoving someone. Enraged is when you are physically causing damage to property or someone. Once you understand what type of anger your feeling describes the resulting behavior that occurred. Reflecting after the journal entries will make you more aware.

Technique #2 — Learn to relax and be mindful

It may sound cheesy but consider taking a time out. When you show symptoms of anger try to re-direct, change your environment, focus on breathing, or go for a walk.

Technique #3 — Learn empathy with compassion

If you don’t have empathy for others how can they have empathy for you? Respond to other’s feelings sincerely and acknowledge them, if you do you’re less likely to respond angrily. 

Technique #4 — Become a better communicator

If you want someone to listen to you, then you must show that you are doing the same. 

Technique #5 — Learn not to suppress or express your emotions but to manage them

 If you suppress emotions they can boil over and burn you. Expressing them can lead to more anger unless it is done constructively. Managing is acknowledging and using the tools to deal with the symptoms before anger comes out.

We must involve God

We must learn to cast our troubles on him, who loves us. We also need to take personal responsibility and manage anger so that we may better serve him and our fellow neighbors.

A well-known prayer is often spoken, “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”

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